Don't be too harsh on yourself. We've all been there. Nothing pathetic about it, we're all human

Try to observe your own behaviour without judgement. Calling yourself pathetic will not make things easier 😘
Just for some context to the tough love, I'm only able to call out your behaviour, because I've done it all myself as well. You're just mirroring my own old patterns. (And I'm not pathetic, so neither are you).
The first thing I did after joining wpac in 2018, was buy a Halios Seaforth two weeks into January... My goal wasn't to fully abstain, but to put no more cash into the hobby. Even so, buying a 750 bucks watch (the upper zone of what I'd ever spent on a watch) wasn't exactly working towards that goal.
I've purchased many watches in a rush, just to be rid of the obsession and get some sleep...
I've told myself my purchases were thoroughly considered, when really it was barely 3 days of obsessive research between becoming aware of it and buying it.
I've steadily walked increasingly outside of my spending comfort zone, because of the hypes of the forum. (Starting at 100-200 bucks, ending up at 800-900 bucks).
I've invented collection "rules" (like one watch for each colour) to justify buying more watches.
I've chased the perfect watch that ticked all boxes. And held on to a boring watch I didn't enjoy wearing for 2 years, because it was supposed to be as perfect as it gets on paper.
I held on to the Seaforth for a year, convincing myself I loved it, because I couldn't justify not loving it because of the amount I spent on it; and because it ticked the yellow box - yellow is my favourite colour, so I must like this yellow watch. Ultimately I had to admit a yellow watch doesn't fit my style, and aside from the colour it was a boring watch.
I've bought watches for occasions. One even as a sort of token during a tough time, which I justified by telling myself it would be a reminder to keep working on my issues. I sold it less than a year later (you can't buy meaning..)
I've bought countless watches because they looked pretty, but that didn't really fit my style and hardly got worn. (Somehow that's a tough one to learn, not everything that is pretty will get worn/you can appreciate pretty things without needing to own them).
The list goes on... So I'm all too familiar with the thought patterns of the addiction. And it took some time to recognize it and get a grip on it.